Here we see a picture of my sweet, innocent, 2-year-old Timmy. He really is a sweet guy. He hugs me quite often throughout the day. I may have also mentioned a few billion times that he is obsessed with my hair. So his hugs always include his tugging at my hair a bit followed by his grabbing a few strands with the intent to pull them out so he can eat them. And he doesn't want to just chew on them. He wants to actually ingest them. I know. It is kind of disturbing. And it hurts!
Timmy also does not take naps very well. Even as a newborn he wouldn't. The only way he'd sleep then was if I was nursing him. I could not put him down for anything. He still needs naps, though, but I simply cannot get him to take one until too late (around 2-4). That means that he wakes up cranky at dinner time, and it also means that I'm up until all hours waiting for him to go to sleep. He prefers to be cuddled in the rocking chair with his blanket, but his version of cuddling means he's going to climb on my head and eat my hair, scratching my face with the all-to-necessary saftey pin that doesn't let him zip down his fuzzies. And every now and then I'll have a bout of wishful thinking and just take him to bed with me, but that makes it all about 50 times worse. In short, it is painful to me to put him to sleep.
And when he finally slips off to dreamland he looks so peaceful and angelic I couldn't possibly be mad. He is one lucky guy. He dang well better know that I love him despite all the pain he's put me through during his two short years on earth. He is definitely the one who has hurt me the most by far, but somehow, it is all worth it anyway. I love him. I love all of my family more than I can even think to say.
And switching gears now, I have felt lately that I'm at a crossroads in my life, a stand-still where my life has been turned completely upside down and I'm sitting here scratching my head and wondering what to do next. But I think I'm coming out of it, and maybe that will mean that I can start blogging and taking pictures regularly again. I have just been so lost in thought and trying to figure things out. I guess it is natural, then, that pictures and blogging would kind of drop off.
You all know by now that we are expecting baby #7. That by itself is enough to turn the world upside down, even if I don't get morning sickness very bad. And then, a few days after I knew I was pregnant (and a few days before I took a test), we had another addition to our home. A girl in our ward was just recently baptized. Her name is Elizabeth, and she has had a really hard time of it, especially since joining the church. Her dad basically told her to leave, and so she was invited to come and live with us. She will be 19 in a few days and is taking classes at our local college.
I can't pretend that it has been all cheery and wonderful. This has been a rough transition, especially for Elizabeth and me. I'm still not quite sure what my role should be in her life. Sometimes things seem to go smoothly, and sometimes things do not go right at all. Really, it is to be expected with two adult females learning to live together. But we are trying, and I hope I can get my act together eventually and figure it all out. Lately I don't like to blame things on pregnancy hormones because it was a definite choice to become pregnant in the first place, so I don't feel like I should complain. But I can't deny that my dang hormones have played a role in this rocky new beginning. Hopefully things will simmer down. And I hope beyond hope that if we give Elizabeth nothing else, we will at least give her a sense of permanence, a sure belief that even if not all good things last, some things will.
Yes, that does raise the question in your mind: do we plan to adopt her? For now we don't know and we probably don't have the money for it anyway. But we will see. We will fast and pray and go to the Temple. We will figure it out.
1 comment:
Posting on your blog once a month is a lot more than some of your siblings are doing! Give yourself a big pat on the back for every little AND BIG thing you do!
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