I've been slacking again! I had thought what a great thing it was that I did Hyrum's little post on the 20th because the next day was Joshua's birthday. I figured I'd do his then. It ended up being a long, busy day! We had planned to go camping that day, but with all the things that went on and with doing all the packing myself we didn't get out the door until the sun was going down. So we postponed until the next day. We had a little party with presents and hurriedly-made cake at our house on his birthday, and then we had our campout with peach cobbler the next day. It all worked out.
Here is Joshua about to blow out his candle.
Joshua turned 11 on his birthday, and he is really frustrated that he has to stay in Primary still. He tells me every Sunday that he doesn't want to go to Primary. But he was really excited to get a Boy Scout shirt for his birthday, so I guess there are perks to being 11. :) He chose a long sleeve one, but now he doesn't want to wear it because the sleeves are hugely long. He had to get a small adult size because the youth sizes are all too small.
Joshua got lucky this birthday. Papa told him that if he would do all his homework every day he would earn a trip to the comic book store. Joshua stuck with it for about a month and a half. Before that he would usually get his homework done, but not always. (Which, so far, has been ok with his teacher. Thank heavens! Some days it just cannot get done.) Anyway, so Jeremy had Spring Break the week of Joshua's birthday. On that Thursday (Joshua's actual birthday) he kept Joshua home from school and they took a trip by themselves down to the valley. They went to the comic book store and the scout shop and ate out. Joshua came home with a shy guy hat he had chosen (shy guys are on Mario games), some comic books that they gave him for free for his birthday, his new scout shirt, and I can't even remember what else. They had a great time. :) We have never allowed them to skip school for a birthday before. I'm not sure we will again, but I'm glad he had such a happy day.
Come to think of it, maybe it's appropriate that I didn't get this done until April because it's National Autism Awareness Month. Joshua was placed on the autism spectrum last year. We have been so thankful to have somebody truly understand him. It was truly incredible to come together with his teacher and the school psychologist and have them know him on such a deep level. I often think of parents who had to fight to get their children's conditions recognized. And even then it was still a fight. We are truly blessed to live when we do now when people actually understand this kind of stuff.
Joshua's autism is a mild form. Back in the day it probably would have been considered Asperger's Syndrome, but they have stopped classifying that and just calling more disorders "autism spectrum." I am ok with that except that autism is such a complicated subject that encompasses differences of all kinds. It seems like it would be helpful to be specific about what kind of autism people are dealing with. But either way, his classification allows him to get the help that he needs at school and it means that his teacher can be very lenient about whether or not he gets his homework done.
Now, let me tell you a little about how Joshua works. He is vastly, endlessly creative. He goes through more hot glue sticks than anybody I've ever seen. He probably goes through about as much paper as I did as a kid, though - a lot! The other day he used hot glue to balance a plastic Easter egg so that it would stand up on the pointy end. One time he made a little water dispenser withe cardboard, straws, hot glue, and a water bottle. Who thinks of these kinds of things?! He may lack athletic dexterity, but what he lacks there he more than makes up for in creativity.
He is also very smart. He is an excellent reader and often just understands big words without having them explained to him. He does struggle in math, but I've noticed that it is because he gets stressed out about it. If he can remain calm he does just fine with it. I have actually spent a lot of time with him in years past working on his math, and it has been a huge, insurmountable task every day. But this year he is working a lot more on his own. He hardly needs any help at all. It was gruelling work to sit with him to do it before because I had to constantly call his attention back to the task at hand. He would figure out the problem and then get distracted before he could write it down and then forget what he was going to write. It took hours every night to get through a normal-size math assignment that would take other children less than an hour. Maybe 30 minutes.
This brings me to Joshua's biggest need - processing. Joshua has to take time to process all the little details in his life before he can move on to something else. He cannot physically move on until he has finished processing it all in great detail. And the way he processes things is by talking about them. He loves to sit and tell me all the little things that go on in his life. He tells me about people's actions that puzzle him or make him laugh. He'll often tell me random things that his teacher says. He'll tell me how his classmates act around him. In his old school he felt like his whole class were his friends. I loved that. Here, there are a few who ask him stupid questions all the time like he is stupid or something. My child is not stupid! Different is not necessarily handicapped or stupid (unless you are different in that you ask smart people stupid questions).
Phew! Got that off my chest.
Anyway, what used to make homework take so stinking long was that he was stopping to process things. And, like I said, he could not physically move on to the next task until he finished processing whatever was on his mind along with all its minute details. It was exhausting working in this way. I am not altogether sure what makes the difference this year, but I know that he feels comfortable talking to his teacher. He feels like he is allowed to, and so he does some of his processing at school. I always wonder how much processing he is actually doing there, but I am so very thankful that she understands that he needs that and allows it. So thankful! It makes his life so much better.
Joshua will sometimes come and sit by me and asks, "Mommy, what are we going to do about the fact that I'm different?" I love that he knows he is different and likes it that way. And I love that he doesn't think it inhibits him. He doesn't look at it as a handicap. That is one huge thing I wanted him to understand, and he does. But he asks because he knows that his other school would have been able to offer him more help than this school can. This school just doesn't have the funding for things like that. And Joshua doesn't feel like this school is giving him all the help he needs. I am not sure how I feel about it, but I do worry a bit as I see him coming up on middle school age. In Cedar City that would mean that he would switch classrooms all day like in high school. If that were the case here he would need some help processing all that switching around. Even though that is not the case here, middle school is a big leap in responsibility. It would be so helpful if he could have a little assistant to follow him around to help him process and remember things. I honestly don't know the answer to his question. I wish there was more help available here. All I can tell him is that his teacher is doing her best to help and that the school doesn't have money to offer him more help.
So anyway, that is something about life with Joshua's autism. It is a challenge, but it is very much worth it. We love Joshua just the way he is and we're thankful for how he is. He blesses our lives. I'm also thankful that there is actually an awareness out there about this kind of thing so that he can actually get some help. He does do just fine in a regular classroom, and I think that is empowering for him. (I've thought so many times about pulling him out and homeschooling him, but I always go back to the conclusing that he is doing fine and that he is growing at school in ways that homeschooling couldn't offer.)
Joshua loves ramen, sandwiches, and pizza. He is not a huge fan of potatoes. He likes to cook from time to time. He loves making crafts. I think he is like me in that he enjoys a book so much more when he discusses it with others. He loves his siblings, especially Jill and Timmy. He and Jill get along really well, and Jill knows that Joshua adores her. He has a pet rat named Scratchy who he takes everywhere he possibly can. Scratchy spends a lot of time sitting on Joshua's shoulder or getting cuddled. Sometimes I worry that he's not getting enough exercise, but he is such a sweet little guy. I have fun watching him. Joshua LOVES Scratchy and has told me a billion times how "adorable" he is.
That about sums it up for now. Joshua is a great guy and we love him to bits!
No comments:
Post a Comment